No parent wants to see their child suffer from addiction. Trying to show your support to pull them out of it can be a little tricky. If you’re not careful you may end up enabling the behavior which does more harm than good.
There are more subtle ways that you can assist them without doing everything for them. It starts with doing your own research.
Keep reading for a few tips that parents of addicted adults need to hear in order to help their child get out of the grips of addiction and start their long, hard journey toward wellness.
1. Confront Your Child When Needed
Dealing with an addicted adult can feel almost like you’re walking on eggshells. If you say one wrong thing they may get defensive rather than take something positive out of what you’re telling them.
Even so, they need to hear what you have to say. Sit down with them and talk about their addiction in a way that doesn’t come across as aggressive. Ask questions and listen to them.
Listening to their side of things is the first important step to take in order to help them.
2. Be Positive
No matter what your child has to tell you, no matter how bad the situation seems, do your best to stay positive. Your support and positivity will rub off on them.
Make sure that they know you believe they can conquer their addiction. This will help them feel less judged and guilty.
3. Don’t Be an Enabler
It’s hard to watch your baby suffer. You want to reach out and help them but if you do this too much they will expect it. This will do more harm than good.
They need to experience the consequences of their actions. If they don’t then they’ll never see just how badly they need help.
4. Offer As Much Assistance As You’re Able
You shouldn’t enable your child’s bad behavior but that doesn’t mean you can’t offer assistance when you can. This being said, try to avoid giving them money if at all possible.
If you give them money whenever they need it this could cause you to be an enabler. Instead, try to provide them with the thing they need the money for.
For example, if they’re asking you for money to get groceries, take them directly to the supermarket.
5. Help Them Find Services
At the end of the day, it may be best for your child to visit a detox center to get help. Stage an intervention and talk to them about going.
Keep in mind that your suggestion is only a suggestion. They may take it or not. Don’t beat yourself up if they don’t.
What Not to Do
1. Don’t ignore the problem or make excuses
Between supporting your addicted child and enabling them, there is a fine line. It can be tempting to downplay or justify your child’s behavior, whether they are abusing drugs or alcohol. You cannot hide the fact that drugs and alcohol are having an impact on them, no matter how much you might want to protect them from criticism from others. They will put off getting treatment if you do this because it will only confirm their perception that they don’t need assistance. Addiction will negatively impact someone’s physical and mental health, finances, interpersonal relationships, and sense of self if it isn’t treated.
2. Don’t berate your child for their choices
Although they initially chose to drink or use drugs, no one chooses to develop an addiction. Alcohol and drugs are potent destabilizers of the brain that have a significant negative impact on personality and behavior. Recognize that your child’s addiction is probably making them feel hopeless or trapped. Giving them “tough love” by saying things like, “I never taught you to behave this way,” will only make them feel more ashamed, more defensive, and more likely to isolate themselves.
3. Don’t make a habit of lending them money
You as a parent might be tempted to cover your adult addict’s living expenses when they are at their most in need. It can be challenging to determine what your financial support is funding, though. Do they spend it on more alcohol and drugs or are they using it for something more worthwhile? If you keep giving your alcoholic child money, they might become reliant on you and lose motivation to kick the habit. They are more likely to consider their actions and work toward recovery if they don’t have a steady source of income, developing fundamental virtues like honesty, accountability, and hard work along the way.
4. Don’t smother your addicted child
Despite your best efforts to make their lives easier, completing basic tasks for your son or daughter and spoiling them in other ways can hinder their progress. They might start to feel as though they are powerless to change themselves and stop making an effort. If you constantly bring up your loved one’s addiction, it might be smothering them and lead to more tension and resentment.
5. Don’t ignore your own needs
It’s normal to be concerned for your child when they are battling a crippling illness like an addiction. However, allowing your fears to control you will prevent you from experiencing happiness and mental peace. Get back to concentrating on your passions and hobbies. Continuing to prioritize your loved one’s needs over your own will wear you out over time and eventually damage your mental health.
How Can Parents of Addicted Adults Help Their Children Get the Help They Need
Your child is your world. Watching them suffer from addiction is one of the hardest things that you can experience. The good news is that you can help.
Use this advice for parents of addicted adults to get started on pushing your child toward the path of recovery.
Did this article help you assist your child with their drug addiction? Check out our blog daily for even more helpful parenting tips.